A Place for Uniqueness, Questioning, Musing, and Celebrating
I mean that in the most loving way possible. I'm not just saying that because she's a teenager. I'm saying my daughter is a warthog because of this book...
I read this book for the first time yesterday, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Mogo is a character I connected with, rooted for (pun intended). It wasn't until I had finished the book and placed it back on the shelf that this realization hit me. I don't even remember what I was doing. I do remember stopping in my tracks as my inner voice shouted "My daughter is a warthog!"
My daughter is living with severe depression and crippling anxiety. She struggles every day to find her inner strength, to be brave, and to face the world. Sometimes she messes up, makes bad decisions...especially when the panic takes over. But she tries every day. She gets out of bed. She gets dressed. She tries. She is Mogo.
Mogo struggles with anxiety and panic as well. He is known as the worrier of his sounder of warthogs. Others laugh at his weaknesses and underestimate him. He underestimates himself. So does my daughter.
Mogo fears change, resisting the need to leave his comfort zone and face unknown risks. As a result of this, he follows others who make poor decisions to avoid having to make his own. He avoids doing what needs to be done because it is intimidating. He fails to trust himself and what he knows deep inside is necessary. So does my daughter.
Mogo is a careful observer, noticing the smallest details and relationships. He proves to be a survivor, learning how to avoid danger by focusing on how to predict or deal with the bad things in his life. This is my daughter, too.
My daughter is a warthog.
Eventually, Mogo begins to trust others. Slowly, carefully. He learns from his mistakes. He learns from the mistakes of others. Survival becomes easier - but somehow not enough. Mogo makes a decision to do more than just survive. He makes a decision to trust in himself and his uniqueness, to use what he has learned for the benefit of others. Mogo finds a reason to live. To thrive.
My daughter is not there - yet. I am thankful, though, to discover that she is a warthog. Like Mogo, she is on the path to conquering the things that hold her down. It took time for Mogo. It will take time for her.
Like Mogo, she is a beautiful, beautiful warthog finding her way.
I love my warthog!
You know the song "No Rain" by Blind Melon? The one with the video where the weird little girl dressed like a bee tap dances through life trying to find kindred spirits and a place to be herself? That's me.